So I actually got a rejection letter from The New Yorker! I feel kind of fortunate, as their website specifies…
“Although we do read all submissions, we cannot respond to them individually or return them.”
And yet!
“Dear ID,
We’re sorry to say that your piece wasn’t right for us, despite its evident merit and humor. Thank you for allowing us the opportunity to consider your work.
Best regards,
The Shouts Dept.”
And you know what? I think they’re being HONEST! It is fucking humorous and displays merit, but it’s a love letter to a heartthrob actor, so not really their audience. Perhaps if it was a love letter to (one of) my intellectual soulmate(s)???

I Luv GWS Trow!
The Tao says, PS, “Accept great misfortune as your own self.”
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