The Ten Best Gifts I’ve Ever Received, in Order of Greatness

1. My friend G wrote me a six-movement piece for steel string guitar. He writes:

“Like yourself, they are very dense works in a very small package. As usual, it’s avant-garde music so you probably wont’ be whistling the tunes in the shower, but I hope you enjoy!”

2. Another friend gave me his sister’s old Caboodle, which is a great carry on bag when you fly.

3. Trapped in the Closet: The Big Package (Chapters 1-24)

4. Midget porn, given to me by my boss

5. A first edition of Lolita, along with a really nice letter

6. Trips (Israel, Brazil), by my parents

7. A mini-knife on a necklace

8. Fresh Direct

9. Netflix

10. A first edition of The Little Prince

(One person is responsible for three of these, and after writing this, I think I may send him a love letter…)

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