Adventures in Unemployment, Part II

So I’m looking around for more paying opportunities even though I have a job in the ghetto (a dude OD’ed in my office this morning and my boss and I drank FourLoko ’round three-thirty.  Not. Kidding.)  One of them that caught my eye was writing about relationships and giving advice (which I am very good at) and it claimed the compensation was “competitive.”  Hm.  So I applied with a cheeky cover letter, natch, and got this automated response.  Grammatical errors and commentary noted by italics.  This dude is also a wee bit too exclamation point happy.

From: PR

To: ID

Hey it’s great to hear from you!

I’m glad to see your interested in the Relationship writer position. There has [have] been many applicants lately so you are lucky to be one of them! [Um, lucky to be one of the applicants?  I think that really could be… anyone?] If you did not already know, becoming an —– is an excellent opportunity to expand or launch your writing career. Since your articles will be displayed on one of the highest visited sites on the internet, your credibility, visibility, and opportunities as a writer will increase drastically. —– are always being featured in magazines, newspapers, local events, and much more!

As an —— you can work from home and write when you want. You will own all of the articles you write, and there is no minimum amount you must write each month. ——- are paid through Paypal every month on time. Compensation is based on page views and other internet variables you will learn more about after applying. Basically what this means to you is that each article you write can earn you money forever! Also, there is no limit to how much money you can make! It’s pretty awesome.

Now let’s get back to the Relationship writer position you are interested in applying for. In order to apply please fill out this online application form here: ——

After clicking the link, choose the “Relationships” category from the drop down list then hit search. From there you can choose any of the topics that interest you. Also, if you wish to write about more than one topic, or topics in a different category, please go right ahead and do so. And if your area is wrong, or you plan on relocating, hit the change location button to choose the area nearest you!

Applying is fast and easy. After applying it usually takes about 3-5 days to see if you’ve been accepted. If you would like to expedite your application, please email me back after your application is submitted!

I look forward to hearing from you and Good Luck!

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