Now even the New York Times Book Review is mocking my inability to finish Anna Karenina. I was flipping through a recent issue and came upon an essay by Elizabeth D. Smart* entitled “Grand Allusion.” It begins like this:
“A good friend recently treated me to one of the preposterous yet mostly true tales for which I prize him. This one involved the Texas Tech University mascot’s horse, Double T., skidding on the turf during a pregame gallop and careening into a stadium wall. While my friend described the fatal accident, I recalled the scene in Anna Karenina in which Vronsky’s horse –– whose name I had momentarily forgotten and was desperately reaching for –– falls in the steeplechase and must be put down.
‘Like Vronsky’s horse!’ I announced. ‘You know,’ I stumbled on, ‘Vronsky’s horse… injured at the races… has to be shot… what’s the name of Vronsky’s horse?’
‘Who’s Vronsky?’ my friend shrugged, and I was reminded that each unhappy allusion is unhappy in its own way.”
Well, Mrs. Smart, I for one did get the allusion (the horse’s name is Frou-Frou, btdubs) and yet am still unhappy as I am sort of convinced you’re part of a larger nefarious plot to remind me of my personal literary failings. Awesome.
*Wondering, now, if Elizabeth D. Smart always used her middle initial or if she perhaps added it post-Mormon Elizabeth Smart’s kidnapping in order to distinguish herself?
Leave a Reply