This is Your Future

LB: maybe i want to move to a tiny house in the woods somewhere
  just me and my books and a dog
  two dogs
me: i fantasize about being a hermit all the time
LB: i guess you still need some sort of income
  this week sucksss
  so depressing
 me:  it’s not a good one
LB: im looking fwd to the weekend
  kind of
 me: yeah me too
  including the “kind of”
LB: maybe i could make moonshine in the woods
 def gonna grow some pot
me: can i come?
  i don’t know what i’ll do
  i can kind of cook now
  i’ll make pancakes
 LB: you can pick some berries
  i like my little life that ive made up for myself
 this this is how ted kazinskys early conversations went?
 me: something like this
  perhaps a little more violent
  i’ve been on the unibomber path for ages now
  my friends are convinced i’ll end up like little edie in grey gardens
 LB: god willing
me: right?
  i said thanks, basically
  lots of people i know are feeling weird
i think this is also because mercury went into retrograde
 LB: interesting
 me: MH: ugh i hate myself today
i hate my bosses
and i hate that i’m still sitting here and can’t find myself proffesionally
 mercury in retrograde
  https://itinerantdaughter.wordpress.com/2009/09/08/mercury-retrograde/
LB: it says gemenis are ruled by mercury
 me: oh man i see it!!!
LB: and therefore will complain extra loud
  me!!!
 me: did you see that thing about geminis who work in publishing?
 also and about pre-mr-ing
 LB: (If you are a Gemini, for example, who works in publishing, it’s no use calling in for a month of mental health days–you can’t escape!)
  yessss
me:  you’re screwed
*36 minute break*
  i went to [out] deal with some shit
  i thought i’ll go there
  and when i come back
maybe something interesting will have happened?
  and yet nothing
 LB: nope
me: not a thing

7 minutes
LB: im not doing ANYTHING
 me: i can’t
LB: i gotta get out of this office for a little
me: i almost drank a beer out of [my boss’] fridge
  when i was there just now
LB: not the worst idea ive ever heard
  but then youd just be tired and annoyed
  when you got back here
 me: yeah
  i know
  nothing helps
  only sleeping
  i just want to sleep
 LB: yeah idk
 me: not to sound like a textbook depressive or anything
 LB: my roommate is going out w this guy she met and theyre prob going to sleep together for the first time
  which is so exciting
 me: maaaaaazel
 LB: but i cant even muster some vicarious excitement for her
 me: i feel nauseated
  all the time

 me:  i am blogging this conversation
with minor edits
 LB:  so you want the entire internet to be depressed?

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