Archive for the ‘Image Craving’ Category

Essays I Will Not Write

January 4, 2015

Again, I’m strengthening my resolve in this new calendar year to focus on the big projects rather than the essays that pop into my head all the time.  As William Styron’s daughter said of her father’s depression, he felt not comforted by the masterpieces he wrote, but hounded by the little pieces he had never gotten around to, “that they were like little beasts and he had watched them turn their backs on him and walk away.”  But I’m thinking, perhaps better to let them go than try to hold tightly to their leashes as they sprint toward the horizon?

So Internet, you’re welcome for this idea: a follow up to this New York Times article about travel blogger Meghan McEwan, who recently bought a very pretty house in the utterly magical Leelanau Peninsula in Michigan intending to turn it into a B&B.  Some things to cover in the article: do virtual dreams fail to satisfy?  Does critical expertise translate to practical know-how?  Is the Leelanau Peninsula the next big thing, or should we never speak of it again so that it remains untouched and pure?  Does she know where Mario Battali lives?  And so on.

You know what, fuck this––if any editor is interested, lemme know.  I can make time for it, depending on how many expenses you cover.

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Kill Yourself

December 16, 2014

A little soon for another blog post but: a $1K diamond KALE necklace.

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Shameless Reblog

November 19, 2014

I saw this little video of an artisanal globe maker on another site recently and was totally enchanted by the art.  I swear I’m not just saying this because of the man’s reference to Hugo, but wouldn’t a globe maker be a wonderful protagonist for a children’s novel?  Or perhaps a short story, in which the lonely globe maker living alone on a tiny island somewhere (perhaps Norfolk Island) draws his dot in the ocean closer to the mainland because he wants to make new friends?

Thinking

November 14, 2014

I think I’ve mentioned here before that I’ve put myself on essay-hiatus (except for a few choice projects) in order to focus on two new book projects, but yesterday I was slightly tempted to write something about the possible change in narrative surrounding Robin Williams’s suicide.  In case you weren’t paying attention, a few days ago, the information that Williams had Lewy body dementia went public.  LBD “usually leads to significant cognitive impairment that interferes with everyday life.”  Back when he died, most people connected his despair to his longtime struggle with addictions, but now it seems he had what many would considerable a more “justifiable” reason for ending his life.  Taken aside the recent high-profile gentle suicide of Brittany Maynard, and the interesting argument journalist Lisa Miller made in a New York Magazine article a few weeks ago.  The piece ends: ” The dignity thing is a red herring, in my opinion, which privileges our voyeurism and consoles the control freaks among us, allowing us to fantasize that in death we can still be young and strong and in charge of outcomes and to look past the bare fact that life and death are unfair, disgusting, and heartbreaking sometimes, and there’s nothing at all to be done about that.”  Not exactly sure where I’m going with all this, but something is a-brewing…

In other news, yesterday I made red velvet CAKIES!

Seriously.  That's what they're called.

Seriously. That’s what they’re called.

My Design for a Thimble Hat

November 7, 2014

Ooo-wee, does it feel good to cross this one off the to-do list!  No, seriously.

Modeled by my girl crush

Modeled by my girl crush

Mwahaha

November 4, 2014

In an act of revenge that will seem meaningless to everyone but me, I stuck my galley copy of Diane Von Furstenberg’s new memoir The Woman I Wanted to Be (cringe) into Jonathan Safran Foer’s mini-lending library outside his $8 million brownstone.  Enjoy, suckers!

Photo of a comparable mini-lending library in Brooklyn.

Photo of a comparable mini-lending library in Brooklyn.

Printing This Out Right Now

November 3, 2014

So I can color it in.

Can I just say, it’s about time the Satanic Temple upped their marketing game!  Scientology has put them to shame.

Lots of Aleister Crowley, I'd guess.

Lots of Aleister Crowley, I’d guess.

Remember

October 26, 2014

When I was obsessing over how to buy beetles to make earrings like the ones from Moonrise Kingdom?  Lulu Frost heard of my plight, and she answered!

Perfect.

Perfect.

Goodness it is TOUGH to be a trendsetter.

Off to Miami tomorrow.  So excited.  Please don’t bother me while I’m there––I’ll be reading and sunbathing.

Live in Berlin in a…

October 17, 2014

Those of you who own The Itinerant Daughter Encyclopedia will know that there are few things I like more than living quarters in structures that were constructed as non-residential spaces.  You’ll see it on the Index of Greatness, right between Romy and Michelle’s High School Reunion and freshly peeled garlic cloves (so delightfully smooth!)  All this to say that if you would like to buy me a condominium in the refurbished Danvers State Hospital in Danvers, Massachusetts, in honor of my upcoming nuptials, I’ll definitely promote you to Best Friend Status.

So––I’ve just been traipsing around Europe, hence my criminal absence, and I discovered that Berlin is a veritable treasure trove of such structures.  Allow me to share a few of my favorites:

1. The Water Tower in Prenzlauer Berg

This round building on the edge of a park in bougie Prenzlauer Berg is basically my dream.  From a blog called Berlin — Around Town:

“The unofficial symbol of the district is the giant, 30-m (98-ft) high Water Tower in Knaackstraße, built in 1877 as a water reservoir, but shut down in 1914. The engine house in the tower was used as an unofficial prison by the SA in 1933–45 – a period recalled by a commemorative plaque. The tower stands on Windmühlenberg (windmill hill), where some of the windmills that had made Prenzlauer Berg famous in the 19th century once stood. Today the round brick building has been converted into trendy apartments.”

Also an acceptable gift.

Also an acceptable gift.

2. This apartment complex in an old hospital in Kreuzberg

We almost stayed here via Air B&B, but then… well, it’s a long story, but we didn’t.  You can though!
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Or framed medical records

Or framed medical records

3. Augustrasse 25

It’s probably no one’s fantasy to live above a dance hall, but Clarchens Ballhaus is no ordinary dance hall.  It’s hosted bloody duels, dances for war widows, and many a Stasi agent looking for an enemy of the people. I feel like you could get used to lying alone in bed at night, listening to crackly old tango records emanating from downstairs.  To be fair, I’m not actually sure that the building HAS apartments in it, but I’m currently trying to track down official CB historian Marion Kiesow to ask.

And a beer garden to boot!

And a beer garden to boot!

And if you are bored, you can just pop downstairs for a concert!

And if you are bored, you can just pop downstairs for a concert!

Casting for Biopics of Poets

September 9, 2014

So, Robert Lowell in the biopic Locked Razors (too morbid?  Title open to discussion) will be played by…

Kinda dreamy, no?  In a bad boy sort of way.

Kinda dreamy, no? In a bad boy sort of way.

… MICHAEL SHANNON!

Grows out his hair a little, and bingo bango.

Grows out his hair a little, and bingo bango.

My boyfriend and I, just apropos of the above, happened to see Michael Shannon recently, looking quite disheveled and walking the streets of Brooklyn muttering to himself.  This segues nicely into the following scary tidbit: I see Philip Seymour Hoffman all the time.  Mostly in subway stations, but on a super regular basis.  A pallid face zooms by me, and I turn around to catch a glimpse of a strawberry blond head, and I think, “Hey, that’s Philip Seymour Hoffman!”  But… isn’t he dead? you’re thinking.  Yes, he is.  Hence the “scary.”