Archive for August, 2011

I feel a little too old for this…

August 11, 2011

… but I’m really digging these pictures of Frances Bean shot by Hedi Slimane.  

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Reasons to Travel to Russia

August 10, 2011

If you apply for a visa to travel to Russia for “business” purposes, here are the options the consulate will give you when it asks you to clarify your business:

ADOPTION

BUSINESS

COMMERCIAL

CREWMAN

DRIVER

FAMILY ATTENDANT

INSPECTOR

LECTURER

MASS MEDIA BUSINESS TRIP

MASS MEDIA/REPORTER

MASS MEDIA/TECH

NEGOTIATIONS

TECHNICAL SERVICES

I think if it were me, I would always pick “negotiations.”

Legitimate Question

August 9, 2011

If anyone works with little kids, can you answer this question for me?  When I was in elementary school, we were often told to sit “Indian-style.”  Given that people are really fucking sensitive about stereotypes and incorrect labels for different ethnicities these days, has the term changed?  And if so, what is it now?  Cross-legged?  Lotus-style?  God forbid, “Native American-style”?  That’s a mouthful for a kindergartener.

Me, Wishing I Were A Fashion Blogger

August 8, 2011

Continuing with my desire to be a kindergarten fashion blogger, a “muse” post.  For instance, a la whowhatwear.com

Currently Channeling: Animal

This is Your Future

August 3, 2011
LB: maybe i want to move to a tiny house in the woods somewhere
  just me and my books and a dog
  two dogs
me: i fantasize about being a hermit all the time
LB: i guess you still need some sort of income
  this week sucksss
  so depressing
 me:  it’s not a good one
LB: im looking fwd to the weekend
  kind of
 me: yeah me too
  including the “kind of”
LB: maybe i could make moonshine in the woods
 def gonna grow some pot
me: can i come?
  i don’t know what i’ll do
  i can kind of cook now
  i’ll make pancakes
 LB: you can pick some berries
  i like my little life that ive made up for myself
 this this is how ted kazinskys early conversations went?
 me: something like this
  perhaps a little more violent
  i’ve been on the unibomber path for ages now
  my friends are convinced i’ll end up like little edie in grey gardens
 LB: god willing
me: right?
  i said thanks, basically
  lots of people i know are feeling weird
i think this is also because mercury went into retrograde
 LB: interesting
 me: MH: ugh i hate myself today
i hate my bosses
and i hate that i’m still sitting here and can’t find myself proffesionally
 mercury in retrograde
  https://itinerantdaughter.wordpress.com/2009/09/08/mercury-retrograde/
LB: it says gemenis are ruled by mercury
 me: oh man i see it!!!
LB: and therefore will complain extra loud
  me!!!
 me: did you see that thing about geminis who work in publishing?
 also and about pre-mr-ing
 LB: (If you are a Gemini, for example, who works in publishing, it’s no use calling in for a month of mental health days–you can’t escape!)
  yessss
me:  you’re screwed
*36 minute break*
  i went to [out] deal with some shit
  i thought i’ll go there
  and when i come back
maybe something interesting will have happened?
  and yet nothing
 LB: nope
me: not a thing

7 minutes
LB: im not doing ANYTHING
 me: i can’t
LB: i gotta get out of this office for a little
me: i almost drank a beer out of [my boss’] fridge
  when i was there just now
LB: not the worst idea ive ever heard
  but then youd just be tired and annoyed
  when you got back here
 me: yeah
  i know
  nothing helps
  only sleeping
  i just want to sleep
 LB: yeah idk
 me: not to sound like a textbook depressive or anything
 LB: my roommate is going out w this guy she met and theyre prob going to sleep together for the first time
  which is so exciting
 me: maaaaaazel
 LB: but i cant even muster some vicarious excitement for her
 me: i feel nauseated
  all the time

 me:  i am blogging this conversation
with minor edits
 LB:  so you want the entire internet to be depressed?

Pet Peeve of the Day

August 3, 2011

A la The Guardian‘s “Digested Read”:

New York Times article “Who Succumbs to Addiction, and Who is Unscathed?”

Don’t bother reading it.  Let me give you the answer: nobody has any fucking idea.

Residency

August 2, 2011

Email sent last night from ID through automated service on govislandpark.com:

A while ago, I read in a wonderful New Yorker article about the island that at one point, it was considered being used as an artists’ colony of sorts.  I think you should go with that plan, and have me come live there.  I’m very small, and I only need one room (two, if you can spare.)  At least let me try to live out the winter there and live blog it for this website or something.  It’s so beautiful, I can’t stand it!

Home sweet home?

Bob Ross

August 2, 2011

Graffiti in NOLA (c) ML 2011

New Words

August 1, 2011

So a few years ago, my friend KM and I decided that clearly there needed to be terms for the following:

When you hate someone based solely on reputation/stories you’ve heard about them

and the converse of that, when you like someone for that reason.

During this time, I didn’t like the fiancee of KM’s friend’s brother because KM told me all these stories that made her sound like a twee twat (ha!!!) and so we named that term after her and called that process being Leslied.  

The converse was named for a friend of mine KM liked only because I told nice stories about her.  That was called being Helened.

Despite the fact that KM has pointed out to me recently that Helen (the real life Helen) has been, for her, Leslied, the terms will remain the same.

The next word to create is the name for a parent’s first spouse.  On the table is one’s “Pat,” as this is the name of my boyfriend’s father’s first wife.  Vote early, citizens, and vote often.