Archive for September, 2012

Nothing to Say Today

September 17, 2012

So instead I cut and paste a poem by Laura Kasischke –– was turned on to this great, dark poet by the article in the Times on Stephen Burt.

Shana Tova?

 

March

 

It’s the murderer

who got away with it

sitting on a park bench

thinking about snow

 

and how it’s over.  Little

flower-faces peeking

out of dirt

to shriek hello.  While

 

the babies wheel

by, absurdly bright.  The old

men in amber.  The light

on the steeples served up

in cones of white.

 

But something here

is not quite right:

 

Old lady

in a little girl’s bonnet.

Ugly dog

with a child’s wide smile.

 

Always, in spring

you’ll find

someone with regrets

she’s allowed herself

to forget:

 

Eye at the keyhole.

Milk in the saucepan.

Strange wet kiss that went

 

on and on and on.

*I got this poem from a blog, where it was in a post entitled “Monday Poem.”  Maybe this verse reminds people of sad first days?

Nonsense, Indeed

September 15, 2012

I subscribe to a weekly newsletter entitled Nonsense NYC which basically lists events around the city that require you to be on at least one hallucinogen to have fun.  This week, this charming fellow below is looking for some help on a “project” of his:

* I live in a ground floor with many windows, I have coated the windows with a material such that no one can see in unless there is bright light. I want to flash people (in our underwear, not naked) through the window. This will involve a group of us (about 16) wearing underwear (preferably white, nothing sexy) and a flashlight. I’m looking for a mix of people (old, young, black, white, Asian, female, male, other) but definitely no creeps or douchebags or spectators. You should be very easygoing and have a flashlight and white underwear, but i may be able to provide both if you don’t have, and maybe wine, but not looking to get drunks. I’m hoping for September 16, meeting at around 8ish, flashing at around 9ish. I think this Sunday trial would be fun and weed out people just looking to party, but I can’t stress this enough, please no weirdos or creeps, this is my apartment after all. Email me with some minor info about yourself and why you’re interested! Contact —.

Aw shucks, I’m busy that evening.  I have to wash my hair.

Discount

September 14, 2012

Thank G-d this bunny chair came down in price!

You should remember the full pic.

I know because I wrote to the maker of this and she wrote me back and quoted a price, and now I must be on a mailing list of some kind or something, because today she sent me this:

merve kahraman

 

to Siobhan <itinerantdaughterandson@gmail.com>

Hi Siobhan, [ed. note: my assistant handles 99.999% of my affairs]

I wanted to let you know that due to a larger order we got this month, we are able to make a discount on a limited number of Hybrid Chairs. Instead of the original 3,100 Dollars it is now been reduced to 2,700 Dollars (excluding shipping).

Please do not hesitate to contact me if you have any further questions.

Well thank heavens!  Once it gets down to maybe $50, I’m IN!

Pound It Out

September 14, 2012

My friend TV is working on a film in Austin, TX with the legendary director Terrence Malick, and sent me a little anecdote about an interaction with him:

“So, last night Terrence Malick gave me a fist-bump. It was one of the weirder moments of my life — he’s not exactly the fist-bumpin type. He came into my edit suite, excited about one of the scenes I was working on (not my work in particular, just how the scene had come out)… then suddenly reached his fist out towards me with a goofy smile (and a ton of rumpled notes, pens, folders, etc in hand). It waited there for several long moments as I tried to come to grips with the situation. Finally, with ZERO self-assurance, I hesitantly pushed out my own fist and gave him a gentle “tap” before he snapped back to rambling about the scene and left the room. I’m sure I’m dramatizing it in hindsight, but it was weird. I don’t know him very well yet, but he’s a funny guy (not talking about his sense of humor) — an awkward introvert who decided a long time ago that he wouldn’t suffer contact with people unless it was necessary for the things he found important (like making movies)… He’s perfectly friendly, but I would never describe him as “fun.” Maybe he’s just starting to warm up to me, and he’ll be perfectly fun later on … he does seem to enjoy drinking (and apparently enjoyed a lot of cocaine in his youth). I’ll keep you posted … maybe we’ll become best of pals — but I doubt it.”

To be a fly on that wall!

Various Online Conversations About THE MASTER

September 13, 2012

Email From KC to me 

(This is far from the first conversation I had on the subject, but it seemed like a good, non-verbal place to start)

Subject: also

Body

!!!

Gchat conversation between ML and me

ML: do we want to see the master on friday?

me: WE CAN?!

ML: it’s opening on friday…

me: oMGOMGOMG

it’s PLAYING AT EAST VILLAGE CINEMAS

ML: 70mm?

me: fuck hold on let me see

YES

yes

YES!

we’re going

ML: are you gonna buy tickets?

this is exciting!

me: what time do you want to go

here are the options

7:30, 8:30 or 10:30

ML: up to you

me: omg omg omg!

WEE

let’s go for 7:30

and we’ll eat late

the movie is 2.5 hours

NO

omg

the only showtime is 11:30 PM!

everything else is sold out

what do you want to do

QUICKLY I ONLY HAVE 6:31 TIME LEFT TO BUY THE TICKETS FROM FANDANGO!

ML: that’s not a shocker

again your call

obviously i can hang with an 11:30 showtime

me: ok we’re going

ML: WOW!

really?

i didn’t think youd’ do it!

me: REALLY!

ML: !!!!!!!!!

WAAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

me: WAAAA

ML: if you were here we’d run about in circles

holy shit this is exciting

me: yes!

this is going to be awesome

YAYAYAY

ML: are you positive the 11:30 is 70mm?

me: YES

ML: really

because they’re clearly showing it in two different theaters and i doubt they are both 70mm

me: well it said 70 mm next to it

ML: like the 11:30 time slot did? or just the theather?

me: on the page about the movie

it says

“presented in stunning 70 mm”

ML: i just called to make sure

IT’S IN THE BIG THEATER!!!

IN 70 MM!!!!

me: YAYAYAYYAYAYAYAYA

ML: WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA

me: WEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE

AHHHHHHHHHHHH

ML: i’m so fucking excited!!!

PTA! PTA! PTA!

HOORAY!

me: YES

this is going to be the BEST NIGHT EVER

we are set

ML: !!!!!!!!

this is jig worthy!

me: it’s totally jig worthy!

i love you and i love our plan!

ML: i love you too!

HOORAY!!!!!

me: HOORAY

LB: Is the master opening soon?

Me: FRIDAY!

LB: OMGOMGOMGOMG

Me: I KNOW

*standard Gchat disclaimer applies

ANXIETY

September 11, 2012

I think I will write something for the Anxiety column of the Times about how anxious I am while writing an Anxiety column for the Times.  Meta, eh?

Once More Into the Breach, Dear Friends

September 11, 2012

Sleepy at Musee Rodin.

For KC: I forgot that last night, I was at the house of either Margaret Atwood or Maya Angelou (though my version was a wispy thing) and she made me stand up and read a poem, five pages long, in front of our poetry class, which was seated outside at a picnic table.  The wind was blowing something fierce, as southerners in books would say, and the pages kept flying out of my hands, and I would have to snatch them up and rearrange them.  Bizarrely some pages included were just visual aids, and though I thought I would knock it out the park, I stumbled all over the words, the only one of which I pronounced with any confidence being tznius.

Ha!

September 10, 2012

Did Ariel Levy just tell Naomi Wolf she has a first world white girl problem? I believe she did!

“This epiphany was prompted by a ‘medical crisis,’ Wolf explains, after which she ‘had a thought-provoking, revelatory experience that suggested a possible crucial relationship of the vagina to female consciousness itself.’ It came at a time when she felt ’emotionally and sexually happy, intellectually excited, and newly in love,’ and yet she ‘started to realize that something was becoming terribly wrong.’  Her ‘clitoral orgasms were as strong and pleasurable as ever,’ and yet ‘I realized one day, as I gazed out on the treetops outside the bedroom of our little cottage upstate, that the usual postcoital rush of a sense of vitality infusing the world, of delight with myself and with all around me, and of creative energy rushing through everything alive, was no longer following the physical pleasure.’  This may sound like a high class problem to you.  For Wolf, it was ‘like a horror movie.'”

~ From Ariel Levy’s review of Wolf’s Vagina: A New Biography in last week’s New Yorker

And yes, Ariel, to me, it kinda sounds like a high class problem.

IT COULD BE WORSE

September 7, 2012

You could have spent a big chunk of your extra money (which isn’t really extra at all, but we’ll ignore that for now) on TICKETS TO SEE MEATLOAF!

HAPPY FRIDAY LITTLE LOAVIES!  (I wish he had a cult fan base that referred to themselves as demi-loaves or something.)

Funny + Sad = Sunny, or Fad? Doesn’t Work. Sanny!?

September 6, 2012

My boyfriend deigns to speak to me via Gchat to relate this hilarious little nugget:

ML: quick story

me: ok

ML: i was biking home last night from the bar

at like 1am

and i passed a street hooker

as i often do

she had her cell phone up like she was on speaker phone

and i’m almost positive i heard her say

“I love you Siri”

me: omg

ML: hahahah

yeah

it was equal parts funny and sad