SPAM?

March 20, 2013

I got at my work email a rather spammy sounding email from a publishing company advertising a new work by a man named Mikhail Armalinsky.  No other information is required.

—
M. Armalinsky was born in Leningrad, USSR in 1947 and resides in Minneapolis, USA since 1977.
He is called the King of Russian Erotic Literature.
Mikhail Armalinsky is not just another talented Russian author, but the revolutionary profit of erotic religion. No Russian author reached the depths of human sexual mentality as Armalinsky did.

His new book has just came out in Moscow

WHAT CAN BE BETTER?
by Mikhail Armalinsky
Short stories and essays. (in Russian)
Ladomir Publisher, Moscow, 2012
528 p., hard cover
ISBN 978-5-86218-503-4
The book comprise Armalinsky’s short stories and essays written from 1999 to 2010 that have originally appeared in his blog General Erotic (GE). Includes his controversial works like:
Einstein as a Fucker and I as Einstein,
Ideal Rape
The Benefit of Sexual Pleasure for Children and others.

Armalinsky is also the publisher of Russian authors of erotic literature
He is the editor of the following collections:
Children’s Erotic Folklore
Russian Shameless Proverbs and Sayings
The First Almanac of Russian Erotic Literature “Copulation”

Armalinsky has translated and published first complete Russian edition of “Philosophy in the Bedroom” by Marquis de Sade.

Since 1999 Armalinsky publishes General Erotic Literary Magazine (in Russian) on Internet
The New York’ Museum of Sex has acquired genital flag by Mikhail Armalinsky. The title of that symbolic art piece is “United State.”
In 1989 “United State” flag made the cover of “Screw Magazine”.

You are welcome to read the translation from Russian of Mikhail Armalinsky’s essay on prostitution “A She-Savior” that was published in Moscow edition of his Selected Works. The translation is made by the prominent Slavic scholar Dr. Brian Baer.

The main idea of the essay “A She-Savior” is that the legalization of prostitution must be based on a return of its divine, sacred character, so that prostitution will be considered the most honorable profession, the one closest to God, the holiest.

Here are the chapters:

A Short History of Prostitution
A Comprehensive Definition of the Prostitute
Why Young Men Need Prostitutes
Why the Lonely Need Prostitutes
Why Married Men Need Prostitutes
Why the Poor Need Prostitutes
Why Old Men Need Prostitutes
Why the Sick and Deformed Need Prostitutes
Why Every Man Needs a Prostitute
The Prostitute and the “Proper” Woman
The Causes and Incentives of Prostitution
Hatred of Prostitutes
The Future of Prostitution

I would be happy to provide you with more information.

A Tweet

March 20, 2013

Lena Dunham looks like Jackie from the 7-Up series at 14 years old.

TV Show

March 18, 2013

A pen pal of mine –– one of quite a few –– had the following idea for a TV show, which I think is really quite brilliant (though his partner is probably right when he says it’s not salable.)  If someone steals it, though, I’m coming after you with an icepick.

“i went through a period of obsession with them (the videos, not LDS) (well, both) — i wrote a TV pilot, which i might have already told you, about an ad agency that specialized in religions. the main character was an ex-nun who was a sex addict. the art director was the Ayatollah Khomeini’s neice (her uncle was a client). i really loved it, but my writing partner, who’s a TV person, was like, there’s no way.”

Philanthropy

March 18, 2013

In addition to starting my scholarship program for spiritual seekers, when I make my millions, I will develop projects such as the one a Mr. James Schober is pursuing.  From TMZ:

Nobody wants to pay for a Casey Anthony interview … but there IS someone who’s offered to pay $10,000 in order to keep the alleged child murderer SILENT for the rest of her life … TMZ has learned.

According to new court documents filed in Anthony’s bankruptcy case, Casey’s camp has received a $10k offer from a man hoping to obtain exclusive rights to Casey’s life story.

But the buyer doesn’t want to make a movie, put her on TV or write a book — the docs explain his sole motivation is to “prevent Ms. Anthony or others from publishing or profiting from her story in the future.”

The man seeking to purchase the rights is James M. Schober — and as far as we can tell, he’s just a random guy with no ties to Anthony or her family.

The trustee handling the bankruptcy case has been tasked with identifying anything of value that can be used to pay back the $800k Casey owes her creditors.

As far as we can see, there’s no way the judge will green-light Schober’s plan.  First, even Casey doesn’t have the exclusive right to her story — someone could write an unauthorized biography.  Besides that … there’s no way a judge would force the sale of thoughts in Casey’s head.

It’s very weird … but the bankruptcy trustee is totally into selling Casey’s story, because he’s asking the court if he can create a bidding war.

He shouldn’t hold his breath.

—

Although if TMZ is correct and he wants to sell the story , then my idea differs slightly because I was just pay for people to be quiet forever.  If I were to make this boatload of money soon, for example, I would make New York Magazine stop constantly running “stories” about Girls (the sheer FREQUENCY of the coverage induces rage) and Gwyneth Paltrow cease and desist penning cookbooks.  Full list to follow.

A Tweet

March 17, 2013

I’m going to start a Chabad prog-rock band and call it Lights and Vessels.

THE WHITE SMOKE COMETH

March 13, 2013

Is anyone else having trouble not connecting the white papal smoke with the monster from Lost?

Something I Want to Say

March 13, 2013

… but that I will most certainly have to cut out of this essay I’m working on.  This is terribly selfish.  I apologize.

“If I’m going to take all Adler’s admirers into consideration here, and I can’t see how I can ignore the throngs of them, then I suppose I’ll start with a borderline sycophant, and re-quote Wilde via David Shields: ‘All criticism is a form of autobiography.’  So if that is so, then perhaps I am the lone critic out there who ends up downtrodden by the incessant nihilism of Adler, because my name is ID, and I am a nihilism addict, and just like an alcoholic cannot take a sip of booze lest he or she tumble down that mineshaft again, I cannot entertain any nihilistic impulse in me because sooner or later I determine that life is meaningless and for me, that’s always been a dangerous path to follow.”

Also, is it possible that The Shining is having a moment?  Evidence: the release of the documentary Room 237 later this month, and also the below:

Jack Torrance dress at Fashion Week.

Jack Torrance dress at Fashion Week.

Shining graffiti in Red Hook, Brooklyn.

Shining graffiti in Red Hook, Brooklyn.

 

I’ve Never Really Wanted to be a Ghostwriter…

March 12, 2013

but if I could take Lisa Pulitzer’s job, I’d be all over it.  From the Times:

Ms. Pulitzer helps young women who have fled religious sects or cultlike organizations give their accounts in compelling, often best-selling prose. “I’m now the official cult gal,” she said over a salad at a French bistro in Huntington, N.Y., where she lives with her husband and two daughters.

She’s written about women fleeing fundamental LDS communities, the Westboro Baptist Church, and Scientology.  G-d DAMMIT life isn’t fair.

Sara and Clare Bronfman –– if you’re ever ready to get out of NXIVM, call me!

Sort of Micrographic

March 11, 2013

As in, the text is small but it’s not writing, per se.  Check out Jamie Poole’s portraits made out of shredded poetry.  poole-4

My Monday

March 11, 2013

will be spent watching True Life: I Hate My Face.

“Two young ladies are sickened by the sight of their own face. Will they deal with what they were given? Or, will they change what they can?”

Stay tuned.